英文原文:
I turned30 last week and a friend asked me if I’d figured outany life advice in the past decade worth passing on。I’m somewhat hesitant topublish this because I think these lists usually seem hollow,but here is acleaned up version of my answer:
1)Never put your family,friends,orsignificant other low on your priority list。Prefer a handful of truly close friends to a hundredacquaintances。Don’t lose touch with old friends。Occasionally stay up until the sun rises talking topeople。Have parties。
2)Life is not a dress rehearsal—this is probably it。Make it count。Time is extremely limited and goes by fast。Do what makes you happy and fulfilled—few people get remembered hundreds of years after they dieanyway。Don’t dostuff that doesn’t make you happy(this happens mostoften when other people want you to do something)。Don’t spend timetrying to maintain relationships with people you don’tlike,and cut negative people out of your life。Negativity is really bad。Don’t let yourself make excusesfor not doing the things you want to do。
3)How to succeed:pick the right thing to do(this is critical and usually ignored),focus,believe in yourself(especiallywhen others tell you it’s not going to work),developpersonal connections with people that will help you,learn to identify talentedpeople,and work hard。It’s hard to identify what to work on because original thoughtis hard。
4)On work:it’sdifficult to do a great job on work you don’t careabout。And it’shard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’tlike what you do for your work。Workvery hard—a surprising number of people will beoffended that you choose to work hard—but not so hardthat the rest of your life passes you by。Aim to be the best in the world at whatever you doprofessionally。Even ifyou miss,you’ll probably end up in a pretty goodplace。Figure out your own productivitysystem—don’t waste time beingunorganized,working at suboptimal times,etc。Don’t be afraid to take somecareer risks,especially early on。Most people pick their career fairly randomly—really think hard about what you like,what fields are goingto be successful,and try to talk to people in those fields。
5)On money:Whether or not money can buyhappiness,it can buy freedom,and that’s a big deal。Also,lack of money is very stressful。In almost all ways,having enough money sothat you don’t stress about paying rent does more tochange your wellbeing than having enough money to buy your own jet。Making money is often more fun thanspending it,though I personally have never regretted money I’vespent on friends,new experiences,saving time,travel,and causes I believein。
6)Talk to people more。Read more long content and less tweets。Watch less TV。Spend less time on the Internet。
7)Don’t waste time。Most people waste most of their time,especially in business。
8)Don’t let yourselfget pushed around。As PaulGraham once said to me,“People can become formidable,but it’s hard to predict who”。(There is a big difference betweenconfident and arrogant。Aim forthe former,obviously。)
9)Have clear goals for yourself every day,every year,and every decade。
10)However,as valuable as planning is,if agreat opportunity comes along you should take it。Don’t be afraid to do somethingslightly reckless。One ofthe benefits of working hard is that good opportunities will come along,but it’s still up to you to jump on them when they do。
11)Go out of your way to be around smart,interesting,ambitious people。Workfor them and hire them(in fact,one of the most satisfying parts of work isforging deep relationships with really good people)。Try to spend time with people who areeither among the best in the world at what they do or extremely promising buttotally unknown。Itreally is true that you become an average of the people you spend the most timewith。
12)Minimize your own cognitive load fromdistracting things that don’t really matter。It’s hard tooverstate how important this is,and how bad most people are at it。Get rid of distractions in your life。Develop very strong ways to avoid lettingcrap you don’t like doing pile up and take your mentalcycles,especially in your work life。
13)Keep your personal burn rate low。This alone will give you a lot ofopportunities in life。
14)Summers are the best。
15)Don’t worry somuch。Things in life are rarely as riskyas they seem。Mostpeople are too risk-averse,and so most advice is biased too much towardsconservative paths。
16)Ask for what you want。
17)If you think you’regoing to regret not doing something,you should probably do it。Regret is the worst,and most peopleregret far more things they didn’t do than things theydid do。When in doubt,kiss the boy/girl。
18)Exercise。Eat well。Sleep。Get outinto nature with some regularity。
19)Go out of your way to help people。Few things in life are as satisfying。Be nice to strangers。Be nice even when it doesn’t matter。
20)Youth is a really great thing。Don’t waste it。In fact,in your 20s,I think it’s ok to take a“Give me financialdiscipline,but not just yet”attitude。All the money in the world will never getback time that passed you by。
21)Tell your parents you love them more often。Go home and visit as often as you can。
22)This too shall pass。
23)Learn voraciously。
24)Do new things often。This seems to be really important。Not only does doing new things seem toslow down the perception of time,increase happiness,and keep lifeinteresting,but it seems to prevent people from calcifying in the ways thatthey think。Aim to do something big,new,andrisky every year in your personal and professional life。
25)Remember how intensely you loved your boyfriend/girlfriendwhen you were a teenager? Lovehim/her that intensely now。Remember how excited and happy you got about stuff as a kid? Get that excited and happy now。
26)Don’t screw peopleand don’t burn bridges。Pick your battles carefully。
27)Forgive people。
28)Don’t chase status。Status without substance doesn’t work for long and is unfulfilling。
29)Most things are ok in moderation。Almost nothing is ok in extreme amounts。
30)Existential angst is part of life。It is particularly noticeable around majorlife events or just after major career milestones。It seems to particularly affect smart,ambitious people。I thinkone of the reasons some people work so hard is so they don’thave to spend too much time thinking about this。Nothing is wrong with you for feeling this way;you arenot alone。
31)Be grateful and keep problems in perspective。Don’t complain toomuch。Don’t hateother people’s success(but remember that some peoplewill hate your success,and you have to learn to ignore it)。
32)Be a doer,not a talker。
33)Given enough time,it is possible to adjustto almost anything,good or bad。Humans are remarkable at this。
34)Think for a few seconds before you act。Think for a few minutes if you’re angry。
35)Don’t judge otherpeople too quickly。Younever know their whole story and why they did or didn’tdo something。Beempathetic。
36)The days are long but the decades areshort。